Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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