yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
