so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
