So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
