I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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