Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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