There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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