i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Randomize
