Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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