K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
