he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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