I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Randomize
