we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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