..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
