my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
