I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
