is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Only a mothe r could love this liver
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
