wakey wakey hands off snakey
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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