Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
