I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize