Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize