with your own penis?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
