Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
