so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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