This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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