Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Randomize
