Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
