And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize