NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize