Dual....:-)
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
