Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
