Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
