I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
