All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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