dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
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