small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
