He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
