This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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