but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
