Where is the hickey?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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