At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
