I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
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