Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.

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  (310): Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive. http://tfl.nu/43yi
  Replies (38) Good night (2962) Bad night (517) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from England

  Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.

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  (+44): Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call. http://tfl.nu/fjfe
  Replies (35) Good night (4321) Bad night (464) Order T-Shirt
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.

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  (417): I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous. http://tfl.nu/gmif
  Replies (32) Good night (4009) Bad night (534) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors

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  (978): just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors http://tfl.nu/9psa
  Replies (65) Good night (16410) Bad night (1150) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight

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  (716): I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight http://tfl.nu/nte9
  Replies (24) Good night (570) Bad night (4840) Order T-Shirt
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"

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  (662): I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits" http://tfl.nu/79pd
  Replies (40) Good night (11150) Bad night (986) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.

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  (313): She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement. http://tfl.nu/rfma
  Replies (25) Good night (9414) Bad night (836) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"

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  (732): apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok" http://tfl.nu/q772
  Replies (19) Good night (3985) Bad night (1479) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.

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  (253): Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style. http://tfl.nu/lnre
  Replies (30) Good night (10662) Bad night (901) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.

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  (406): Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care. http://tfl.nu/dahm
  Replies (8) Good night (771) Bad night (2878) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.

  (1-724): View more from Pennsylvania

  you didn't get her number why?

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  (724): So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends. (1-724): you didn't get her number why? http://tfl.nu/gt6x
  Replies (7) Good night (2695) Bad night (1430) Order T-Shirt
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.

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  (416): I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn. http://tfl.nu/iixt
  Replies (13) Good night (2710) Bad night (714) Order T-Shirt
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..

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  (270): You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it.. http://tfl.nu/hsv3
  Replies (2) Good night (1704) Bad night (457)
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  (569): View more from

  I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome

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  (569): I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome http://tfl.nu/60qi
  Replies (6) Good night (1243) Bad night (351) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.

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  (314): My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine. http://tfl.nu/qh5s
  Replies (2) Good night (1000) Bad night (268) Order T-Shirt

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