I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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