it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Randomize
