Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
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i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
organizing the empties. That sober.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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