my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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