Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
