I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
