Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
