susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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