Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
